Change - n, the act or instance of becoming different. v, change direction.

You are standing in line. Suddenly you hear someone behind you gushing with genuine happiness. They’re floating on positivity and loving their life! Instantly you smile. It’s virtually impossible to resist the urge to turn around and look behind you! I dare you to try. A craving so strong dismissing the urge to look, feels equivalent to a missed opportunity. They have electrified the crowd in which they embody.

When we need a jump start these beautiful people energize our batteries and recharge our minds.

As a society we are extremely lucky to have these little pockets of motivational seeds scattered among us. Lightweight bursts of cheer. Whether it be an inspirational quote on Facebook or a random act of kindness. When inspiration strikes it can urge us to soar! Without notice ideas that have sat below the surface brewing for years begin to rise. Inquiries start to develop probing our mind. Mixing unachieved dreams of yesterday with the wonderment of possibilities for tomorrow. Complicated hypotheses attempt to solve questions on why some important goals never flourished. Attempts began, but success somehow never achieved. These momentary refreshing breaths nudge us toward an inner desire to look deeper into ourselves. Somewhere along the way the inspirational spark became dark.

Rethinking Positive Thinking, a book by professor and psychologist, Gabriele Oettingen is a book that draws on 20 years of research inside the science of motivational change. As life presents us with imperfect situations we have been conditioned to focus our thoughts on positive thinking. I believe many can relate to growing up under the impression, negativity should be not be spoken.

Long live the dream … “If I can believe it, I can achieve it!!

Her research tells us the answer lies in how you process change. The professor explains positive thinking is an actual high. A state in which your brain is unable to decipher whether you are fantasizing or picturing true intention. This declaration is the result of many large-scale scientific studies on goal achievement. She has determined through research a link between positive thinking and poor performance. Wait! What?? That can’t be right! Those bursts of positivity are known to be energizing! We know that for a fact. Yes, those hints of happiness certainly stir our soul. Feeling pleasure in the moment is essential and helps us explore our overall potential. Inspiration is extremely necessary. However, surprisingly the long-term hopes and dreams in many instances leave us less energized with less optimism. The motivation toward our goals slowly spirals away from us.

On a physiological level, studies show wishing and fantasizing lowers blood pressure keeping us in a state less prepared for action. Change requires a bit of a fire under our feet mentality. While thinking of the same idea in a context of defeat, blood pressure will rise. Dreaming and wishing is more comfortable and feels more calming in the short-term, but in the long-term it leaves us with less energy for adaptation. In other words, perhaps it is best to spend that time preparing for failure. Bring on the negativity!

Believing the door to happiness will not open is more likely to open more doors.

This idea is called mental contrasting. Visually walking yourself through the good, the bad and the ugly. It combines our dreams with visual obstacles. Positively fantasizing about an outcome you want in your life without fantasizing about the negativity can be self-destructive. By facing the reality of all scenarios we are acknowledging the fears. An acceptance of true failure needs to be at the forefront of change. Fantasies of success don’t propel us forward, they relax us and slow us down.

Deliberately visualizing various scenarios, hurdles and issues in a realistic state is more beneficial than dreaming of the coronation.

For instance, one study followed patients who were pursuing weight loss. It was found the more positive the patients were about their success the less weight they lost. Continuing on that pattern, the more positive knee replacement patients were about their upcoming recovery the longer recovery time they endured. In addition, many more studies fell under the same umbrella.

The act of visualizing success throughout the process places you directly in line with failure.

Changes in our behavior can successfully happen by restructuring how we visualize the future. The key is to combine positive thinking with the reality of what stands in the way. This process can be shared throughout different parts of your life. Here is an acronym that better explains the process.

WOOP

W - WISH

Select the number one wish for your life at this moment. One that is challenging yet still attainable. It’s ok to dream small or big! Select a wish to pursue that can actually begin today! Only in this step of the process do you wholeheartedly see attainment. Structure a timeframe by week/month/year.

O - OUTCOME

Imagine the outcome of your wish. Visualize the best scenario at the end of your efforts. List all the benefits you will receive as a result of following the plan. Write down why the emotions associated with the outcome are so important to you.

O - OBSTACLE

Completely embrace everything that could possibly go wrong with your wish. This includes personal sabotages, emotional baggage or addictions. Be real about destructive habits. We all have them. Clear the air with yourself right from the beginning.

P - PLAN

Devise a plan to overcome possible obstacles. It begins with if/what statements. “If” obstacle A creates a roadblock then “what” is the course of action. Chronic procrastination may be an expected problem. Prepare for it in advance! Save your willpower for the unexpected obstacles.

Is it time to take down all those motivational quotes we share on social media?

Absolutely not. Sharing momentary smiles of gratitude follows the WOOP philosophy. At the end of the day the obstacle is the priority. Remember we want to get stuck figuring out all the obstacles not stuck in the dream. Dreamers are often non-doers.

What if your wish doesn’t feel clearly defined?

Your wish can encompass any genre. A professional, emotional or health goal. Set aside some alone time to solely focus on you! Step away from your phone if possible. Solitude and silence; where your only thoughts are controlled by deep seeded needs. This is about boldly going where you haven’t went before. Perhaps achieving the results you’ve never seen before.

Change

When the quiet is loud enough

The mind will fill with noise

Change takes the lead

Breaking down a voice

When the need is strong enough

The body will fill with action

Change guides the way

Laying down traction

When the sky is dark enough

The eyes will fill with rain

Change runs ahead

Breaking down the wave

When change is abrupt enough

Life will overflow with demands

Negativity must spill out

Into a river that can only expand

©S.Ihrig

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Work Cited:

Oettingen-Spielberg, Gabriele zu. Rethinking Positive Thinking inside the New Science of Motivation. Current, 2015.